In the last week I’ve run across two people who seemed to be more interested in yammering on and parroting misinformation than in understanding the situation or helping people.

One turned out to be a salesman, and the other was a consultant. Yeah, I was totally shocked.

One time in the mid-90s I had a small business. A salesdroid ignored the “no salesmen” sign and came in. I asked him if he saw the sign. He said:

"when I see a sign that says NO SALESMEN I think it says SALESMEN WELCOME!" > >

…and grinned like he was really clever. I imagined him having a heart attack on my carpet and smiled a little.

Then he told me he wanted a job selling whatever it was we sold. (Internet and web hosting, primarily). I told him it was technical and not a good fit for salesmen. He said:

Don't worry about that! Just give me a pamphlet and I'll be out sellin' in 10 minutes! > >

…as if it were a good thing to have a clueless, bullsh1tting a-hole out there representing my company. We had all the business we needed/wanted by word-of-mouth.

I threw him out, and he maintained that moronic Ziglaresque “a no just gets me closer to a yes!” faux-optimistic expression that often masks incipient alcoholism and serial infidelity. Such is life for men who peaked in high school.

In case I have been too subtle: I do not like salesmen.